Regrets

I was sorry to leave Florida and Robert behind. I wish I could let my Robert catch me, but I can't. I cannot drag him into this mess that I made. If I had only realized that... but there is no sense in pondering what should have been. I have spent the last 15 years wishing that I had told Robert how much and how deeply I love him. We still have those sparks between us. I could feel on the waterfront last year in Port Charles and I could feel it in May. If only Luke had given us a few moments alone.

My travels have now bought me to a place that brings me memories of a happier time, my life with Robert. What I would give to get that back.

Paradise & Robert?

I found a lovely piece of paradise on Marco Island. The food and champagne were marvelous and the beach was just heaven. I have been running all over the globe these days. I love an adventure, but they are best shared. It seems this one is just too dangerous to share with anyone I love. I think I finally understand why Robert always wanted to leave me out of his work. I never thought I could miss anyone as much as I miss him. Seeing him this past year was so hard. It was harder still allowing him to believe such horrible things about me and what I have been doing. He haunts my thoughts and my dreams. If only I could settle all this business. Still, I cannot even manage to stay in one place safe for very long. I thought I finally lost anyone following me, but today I had the oddest sensation i was being watched. Could it be Robert I felt?
I cut my little trip to the beach short...and it seems it is time to leave again.

15 yrs ago I was reunited with Robert...

On that wonderful, yet anxious day on Jan 17th, 1992 I was reunited with my one true love, Robert Xavier Scorpio. Let me recall the events as they happened.

I was in NYC on family business, working on a con to retrieve a stamp, supposedly a family heirloom that had been stolen by Dominique Stanton (Taub)'s family. (as I was told by Uncle Clive)
I felt I owed it to the family to do a couple cons here & there because they paid all my medical bills whilst I was in the hospital after my accident, and subsequent coma. They also kept me alive with the faith that I would awaken one day, when they could have easily pulled the plug. When I awoke, they stood by me during my re-cooperation. My family did not contact Robert to let him know I was alive, but I learned of his engagement to pianist Katherine Delafield, and subsequent marriage to Anna Devane, of all people. He had moved on, and I felt it was not my place to disrupt his life. I then went to stay with my sister in San Sebastian shortly after my recovery, and when things got rough there, that is when I returned to my family, and they welcomed me back & supported me, as I had nowhere else to turn. Even though I really think conning people is wrong, I felt I owed them.

The con started out with my cousin Barry & I going to NYC, where Dominque lived. I moved into a suite in the same building as Dominiques' penthouse. Barry stayed at a hotel, and to be inconspicuous, he went by a different last name, and I went by a different name altogether. Being that close to Port Charles, in the same state, I didn't want anyone to recognize me, so I went by Sabrina Hamilton.

The plan was to befriend Dominique so that Barry & I could get a chance to look for the missing stamp. Well, I sort of just stumbled into that one, as I ran smack dab into Mac, Dominique's dashingly handsome boyfriend. I had a puppy with me who knocked him over, whilst he was carrying a bottle of wine. I looked into his eyes, and immediately something felt familiar. Yes, he was good looking and charming, but his eyes reminded me of Robert's. So trusting & caring.

Well, I ended up taking a new bottle of wine to Mac & Dominique, when I was invited to Mac's Birthday party. Perfect! I was thinking that I could go to the party & perhaps wander around, find a stamp collection, and get the con over with as quickily as possible. Mac & Dominique seemed quite pleasant, I so hated when my targets were nice people. I was having a marvelous time at the party. Mac & Dom were busy entertaining guests, and it was the perfect time to slip away. I said I had to make a phone call. The lights went out in the penthouse, and I had slipped into another room & was checking my makeup.

Someone entered the room, I was a bit startled; I figured maybe it was Mac or Dom, and was ready with an excuse for being in there. I turn around & swear I saw a ghost...my heart raced so fast, it couldn't be... ROBERT! But he looked at me as if he'd seen a ghost...he called me by my name...it was him! I couldn't speak, I froze; luckily I didn't have a chance to explain, because some of the party-goers entered the room, he turned around to them, and I ran. All I could do was run... How could I even begin to explain to him how I was alive? Why I didn't tell him...he would never understand. I slipped out through the penthouse, no one noticed me. I had to get back to my room & get out of there. Once I knew Robert was somehow involved in this, I could not continue...I must've narrowly missed him, because I learned later that he came to my room to look for me, and I had left behind my black handkerchief with the letter H on it at Dominique's. Also, I forgot to grab my favorite perfume from my room. The kind that Robert always bought for me at Christmas time. He knew it was me. I wondered how he felt seeing me...but I was too afraid to find out.

I caught a taxi & went to stay at Barry's... I could not sleep, all the memories of the love Robert & I shared kept flowing through my mind all night. At some point I must've fallen asleep, because Barry was waking me up in the morning, and I had wished it was all a dream...

I will continue more later, for now I will have sweet dreams of my Robert...
:)